Mark Blevis

During one of his visits to Ottawa when I was still of single digit age, my “cool” Uncle peeled back the lid of a brand new can of tennis balls. Back then tennis balls came in aluminum cans like Pringles and breaking the vacuum seal made a satisfying sound as it exposed three fluorescent yellow balls. There was also that factory smell. It was a kinesthetic experience.

He took out the three balls, set the empty can on the concrete steps of the house we were at. We were probably 10 feet from the can when he handed me the balls and coached me through throwing the balls to knock over the can. He tweaked the experience as we went.

As an adult, I recognize this was more than just target practice. It was an exercise in goal setting, focus, skills development (hand-eye coordination, strength awareness, physics) and psychology (confidence, fear management, thought management) using specific tools.

In that moment, my Uncle Ken became my first mentor. Or, as I referred to it in a post I wrote last week, he became my first Jedi Master.

That post, The World needs more mentors, has served as the launching point of a number of fascinating conversations. In one, I was asked how entrepreneurs could establish a mentor network.

Let me first come clean and say I haven’t yet done this myself. So, my tips here are simply based on connecting the dots with a variety of loosely related experiences. That’s what mentors prepare you to do. And, I plan to follow my own advice.

First, it’s important to understand what a mentor is. In conversations, I’ve come to realize many people confuse leaders and managers as mentors. It is possible one person can fill several roles. This is not always the case.

Here is my lightning definition of a mentor:

A mentor helps you recognize and realize your own potential.

To further clarify my thoughts, a leader sets goals and guides us to what we can collectively accomplish; a manager breaks down the process, distributes the work and makes sure people deliver their pieces. A mentor teaches you to throw tennis balls at a can.

I’ve only started thinking about this now. So, here are my initial tips to establishing and meeting regularly with a mentor network in the hopes this could kick off a larger conversation.

• Make it multi-disciplinary. You need to learn skills through the metaphors and understandings only afforded by varied interests. It will be very limiting to your art if you’re a classical pianist and you only surround yourself with other classical pianists. Your mentor network probably needs a conductor, songwriter and other musicians from different genres. But don’t stop there. You can probably discover more of your own creative potential from a taxi driver, a sports coach and a restaurant manager. Find your “jock-uncle-with-tennis-balls” wherever you can.
• Scale it. It won’t be practical to coordinate gatherings of 30 people. At its core, your mentor network should probably be five or fewer people. That means being selective; striking the balance of discipline insiders and discipline outsiders. I’d probably skew more outside. You may want to have an extended mentor network which is less formal, though consistent nonetheless. This is where Skype can help you connect with mentors who may not live in your immediate locale.
• Caffeinate your apprenticeship. In order to get the full benefit of your network, you need to actually meet with it. I suggest scheduling monthly get-togethers over coffee. There are two benefits of the coffee approach: it makes it more social (face time rather than virtual) and you can acknowledge the contribution of your mentors with the gesture of a beverage. Most mentors will be mentors anyway; they’re not interested in compensation. The coffee at least represents an appreciation of the contribution. While it would be ideal to convene gatherings of your full network, don’t delay your growth waiting for everyone to be available at one time. Break your monthly meetings into two or three groups if that’s the only way it will work. And remember that you can’t throw tennis balls in a coffee shop. Meeting places should be flexible.
• Treat your mentor network as a board of thought. Mentors shouldn’t control your business, business decisions or five year plan. They should help you gain a greater understanding of the world around you and how it can inform your own personal and professional development. This is done by chatting about events/activities/books/people in an effort to explore approaches rather than solutions. Mentors know there are no right or wrong answers. They will help you make informed decisions by helping you create neural pathways. They understand the connection between tennis balls and personal/professional achievement.
• Ask questions and listen and contribute. As the apprentice, your main goal is to learn. You need to be a sponge and connect new ideas with those you’ve already established. However, mentors will need to gain a better understanding of you. Many recognize themselves as students as well. In that respect, your mentor network is symbiotic. You need to share your own thoughts and experiences to complete the circle. Introduce your mentor network to their own can of tennis balls.

What about you? Do you have any thoughts on establishing and meeting with a mentor network?

Photo: Old skool tennis balls Pancho Gonzalez signature Spauldings uploaded to Flickr by djneight.